website, blog and vanity nexus of writer R F Brown

Train (2008)

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The Ministry of Culture and Tourism of Ukraine should not tolerate this sort of behavior.  Recently when an American amateur coed wrestling team came to their country for a competitive tour, they wanted to see the beautiful landscapes from the windows of a Trans-Carpathian train.  Instead, everybody in the Ukraine acted like these Americans were just husks full of quality resalable body parts.  Why it happened on board a moving locomotive I’m not sure.  A sexy Ukrainian doctor pretended to be helping them on their way.  She really just wanted them trapped on her train where her retarded operatives could kidnap the Americans and perform live, horrific organ extractions.  There was one American chick wrestler, played by the once promising Thora Birch, who was pretty good at outwitting the retards.  Eventually she escaped the train and the organ harvesters, but she did have to walk home from the Ukraine.

If you like scalpel gore and human torture there’s a ton here for your pleasure.  If you like Ukrainians, you might find Train a rather bigoted representation.   Me?  I really don’t get it.

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